unfair.

"let's just put it this way: i've been praying. i don't pray."
i can't believe they're doing this to her. you can't just do this to a person. it's not fair. she told me that for the first time, she's finally found a place she loves coming to. and now...they just decide that they're gonna ship her off somewhere else? and they tell her that she should be happy that she still has a job, but that's the stupidest thing i've ever heard. how do you expect someone to be happy about this situation at all?

maybe i don't understand the logistics of it all, but what i do understand is that i don't want her to leave. i hate it when people leave. it's not fair. she belongs here.

sleepfest.

so last night i was pretty tired from my day and decided to take a little nap. but i guess i didn't realize how tired i really was. it was around 8:00 or 8:15 or something and i hopped in bed. just in case i didn't wake myself up, i set my alarm for 10:15. and just in case that didn't work, i set my away message to "nap. someone wake me up at 10." with everything set and ready to go, i put on my maroon 5 playlist and shut my eyes.

...athena didn't open her eyes until about 20 minutes ago. the alarm didn't wake her up. the phone calls didn't wake her up. the text messages didn't wake her up. the instant messages didn't wake her up. nothing woke her up. she was knocked out.

11 hours of sleep. impressive, athena. impressive.

movie ruiner.

never in my life have a wanted to shove a bucket of popcorn in someone's face more than i did today. i went to go watch narnia this afternoon at cerritos mall and discovered the most annoying movie-goer on the face of this earth - maybe even in the entire universe. the movie was going along perfectly fine and this guy (plus friends that were not anywhere near as annoying) came in a little while into the movie. he seemed normal except he ate his popcorn kind of obnoxiously. shoving handful after handful into his huge mouth and sipping his drink kind of loudly. didn't think much of it and tried to ignore it. then...he decided to open his mouth.

"this is stupid. that was so fake. that was retarded. this is boring. i wanna leave." i wish he would've just kept eating his stupid popcorn. and to add to all of his annoying comments, he was making me feel a bit uncomfortable because he was hogging the armrest and leaning way too close to me. and when he wasn't blubbering and complaining or eating his popcorn, he was picking his teeth to get pieces of popcorn out of them. extremely disgusting.

i wanted to leave so badly. but i controlled myself and sat in my seat the entire movie like a good little girl. i just wish azlan would've come out of the movie screen and eaten that guy right up. i swear, it would've turned it into the best movie i had ever seen in my life.

gavin's song.

"i wish you freedom. i wish you peace. i wish you nights of stars that beckon you to sleep. i wish you heartache that leaves you more of a man. i wish i could be there, but i can't.

i wish you places that sit so still where people never ever change, never ever will. i wish i could hold you and make you understand. i wish i could be there, but i can't.

be good for your mama cause she'll need a hand to hold. boy, she loves you more than you'll ever know. there are rhymes and there are reasons and times when nothing stayed the same, but you know my love still remains.

i wish you wisdom. i wish you years. i wish you all these to conquer all your fears. i wish you courage from all that life demands. i wish i could be there, but i can't.

be good for your mama cause she'll need a hand to hold. boy, she loves you more than you'll ever know. there are rhymes and there are reasons and times when nothing stayed the same, but you know my love still remains.

i wish we were together. i wish i was home. i wish there were nights where i was never alone. you know i've said it and i'll say it once again...

i wish i could be there, but i can't."

read these lyrics. please.

more band(aid).

(sorry the camera keeps moving. i was jittery. haha.)
(and lydia paek is amazing.)

band(aid).

nervous faces!
lydia paek!
olivia thai!
PASSION!!!!!!! <3333
akshdlkfashfd; i'm so happy right now. you don't even understand.

prom 2008.

say cheese!
table ten.
dude, kelsy. haha.<3
albert!
on the deck.
long: "i spy something...orange."
athena: "is it that red blinking thing over there?"
yeah, okay. shh.
and there's a million more pictures, but i don't feel like posting them at the moment. :)

telephone tag.

long called karakash. karakash didn't know. long had to leave and i found vicky and sheena. karakash asked jeff chao. jeff chao didn't know either. i called my house. no one picked up. i called my house again. no one picked up. i called shane. he didn't know either. vicky's phone died. i used sheena's phone. house again - no one. i called jeff chao. i didn't know michael asked him. he still didn't know. gerard came. gerard had cory's number. i called cory. he answered. i talked to my sister. i went home.

and add to that: long called cory a couple times. he never answered. long called shane, too. he still didn't know. long called kathleen. kathleen called john choi. john choi called cory. he answered. finally.

i think i was already home.

tetris.

without failure, i manage to play this game at least fifteen times every freaking day. i don't know how, but i always end up playing it somehow or another. i honestly don't think it's healthy how much i play. and i made a note the other day while i was playing: i play much better when i have a lot of stuff on my mind. i think playing helps me forget whatever i'm thinking about. and it fascinates me as to how someone even came up with this game. genius, yes. but how on earth...

anyway, conclusion. tetris is a fantastic stress reliever/boredom killer. but i warn you, don't get too addicted.

happiness is...

1. two and a half hour naps (when they're really only supposed to be an hour).
2. walks to dairy queen after school.
3. zero amount of homework over the weekend.
4. bounce houses!
5. peanut butter and banana sandwiches.
6. playing with ridiculously expensive/amazing cameras.
7. prom in 12 days.
8. having something to look forward to everyday, no matter how small.
9. sesame street band-aids.
10. being completely useful. (i.e. me)

so many things that make me happy, yet i still need to be happier.

gravity.

"something always brings me back to you. it never takes too long. no matter what i say or do i'll still feel you here 'til the moment i'm gone. you hold me without touch. you keep me without chains. i never wanted anything so much than to drown in your love and not feel your rain.

set me free, leave me be. i don't want to fall another moment into your gravity. here i am and i stand so tall, just the way i'm supposed to be. but you're on to me and all over me.

you loved me 'cause i'm fragile when i thought that i was strong. but you touch me for a little while and all my fragile strength is gone.

set me free, leave me be. i don't want to fall another moment into your gravity. here i am and i stand so tall, just the way i'm supposed to be. but you're on to me and all over me.

i live here on my knees as i try to make you see that you're everything i think i need here on the ground. but you're neither friend nor foe. though i can't seem to let you go. the one thing that i still know is that you're keeping me down. you're keeping me down. you're on to me and all over.

something always brings me back to you. it never takes too long..."

little things.

i was having a pretty crappy day until i signed onto facebook and read this: Michael Habashi wants you to SMILE.

i read it.
i smiled.
i was a little better.

and i was having a pretty crappy day until i signed on to aim and talked to her and she said this:
"Victoria Hoang" (9:18:53 PM): hahah. dude, if i had my license, i would have been out the door an hour ago and picked you up

my feet are sore, but maybe today will end okay.