Thursday, March 13, 2008

on a scale of 1-10.


“are you okay?” he said after giving me a hug. i nodded. it wasn’t a lie. it was…..a reflex. but i didn’t correct myself. correcting myself would have involved explaining. and had i explained, i would’ve been late for class.

20 minutes until school is over. and as i sit here in cluster with the day almost done, i guess i’m “okay” now. but just okay. nothing more, nothing less. people asked me what was wrong during the day, but i couldn’t tell them. one reason being because i don’t really think people want to hear about my problems, no matter how concerned they may seem. and two, i really just don’t know the answer.

this mindset that i have about people not wanting to hear my complaining and ranting about life just makes me keep everything to myself. i’d rather listen to other people talk than me anyway. besides, being a burden is never fun. but sometimes it's hard trying to be the one who always makes other people happy. i’m allowed to be sad sometimes, too.

...right?

3 comments:

kimlypv said...

so went through a phase like this. for a couple months actually. call kimly if you change your mind and feel like talking. or call kimly so we can watch rent this weekend.

Christine said...

You've always got my ear... and shoulder.
Whatever, whenever, wherever.
:]

Jessica said...

i totally know how you feel. i've been feeling like that this week a lot. but other people make me feel better without even trying. like you did, for example. so i'm better now. but if you need someone, i'm here for you. hopefully, you'll feel better soon. also, know that you're one of my most favorite people i've ever met in my life. really, it's true. i love you athena!